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Previously onThe O.C.:
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I got you an appointment
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with the best
sports medicine doctor
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in all of Orange County.
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My dad really loves me.
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So he's gonna really like you.
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I have to tell you something.
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I just want you
to know the truth.
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I think I'm in love with you.
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So, Summer Roberts,
you saved Chrismukkah.
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Chrismukkah.
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Well, that must be
a lot of fun for you.
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Yeah, well, you know,
we have fun with it.
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Nope!
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Nope!
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Look at the branch spacing.
It's like Swiss cheese.
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And these stems couldn't hold
heavier ornaments.
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So that's a pass then?
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Why not?
We've been here three hours.
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Hey, get in
the spirit, man.
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It's Chrismukkah and
I love Chrismukkah.
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So we've heard.
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Seriously, the best thing
I've ever done.
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Every Jewish boy
wants Christmas.
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I gave myself that.
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Well, what's
the equivalent?
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What does every
Christian kid want?
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Easy, a bar mitzvah.
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I've never wanted one.
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Well, that's just 'cause
you don't know better.
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Oh.
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Coop, let's look
over here.
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Again?Yes.
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Sorry.
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Seriously, I think you should
really consider it.
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What, a bar mitzvah?
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Yeah, you've brought some much
needed "Chris" to the Cohens.
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But I think you could really
use a little "mukkah."
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Mm, I don't think so.
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It's tough talk from a guy
that eats a lot of bagels.
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Oh, you think Johnny
would like that tree?
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Johnny?
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Johnny who?
Johnny Harper, Johnny?
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Johnny, the one
"let's take time off,
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just be friends because
I'm in love with you" Johnny?
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It's just, I feel bad.
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I mean, it's the holidays
and he's all alone
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laid up with his knee.
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I don't know,
Cooper-Scooper.
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That's a bad nickname.
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00:01:52,329 --> 00:01:54,157
And, besides, I already
talked about it with Ryan.
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And he's cool
with everything.
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Hmm.
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It's just a tree.
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Okay.
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But I get to pick it out.
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Everything cool
with you and Marissa?
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Yep, we had
a really good talk.
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Mm-hmm, the whole
Johnny thing?
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There is no Johnny thing.
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I mean, there is,
but not for her.
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Anyway, it's the holidays.
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I'm sure Johnny's the
last thing on her mind.
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Hey, so we found a great tree
for Johnny's house.
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Did you now?
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Yeah, well, I figured he could
use some holiday cheer.
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I think that's
a good idea.
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Come on.
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And what do you
think, Cohen?
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My Chrismukkah forecast
calls for trouble.
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[ piano and acoustic guitar
strumming gentle melody]
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♪ California, here we come ♪
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♪ Right back
where we started from ♪
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♪ California ♪
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♪ California... ♪
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Hey!
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Oh, hey. Marissa.
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If you're looking
for Johnny,
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it's probably not
the best time.
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Is everything okay?
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JOHNNY:
Who is it, Ma?
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Hey, guys.
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Hey. Brought you a little
something for the holidays.
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It only took Summer
five hours to pick it out.
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Thanks, that really nice
of you guys.
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That is nice.
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Here, let me.
Yeah.
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I'll be inside.
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What's going on?
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Nothing. Um...
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just... we got a call
from the doctor.
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Something wrong
with the surgery?
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There's not gonna be a surgery.
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Apparently, my mom's insurance
doesn't cover it so...
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So he's not gonna do
the operation?
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He would...
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if we could
pay for it.
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So I guess I'm gonna have
to get used to living here
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a little while longer.
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Sorry, man.
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00:04:02,677 --> 00:04:04,374
It's cool.
You know,
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I was kinda getting
sick of surfing anyway.
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Thanks for the tree.
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00:04:09,379 --> 00:04:10,511
I'll see ya.Yeah.
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I think he really
liked the tree.
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Hey.
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I tell ya
the air is crisp.
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It must be 70 degrees
out there.
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The kids are not back yet
with the tree?
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Oh, not yet.
Seth said they'll be awhile.
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I'm just pulling out stockings
and menorahs and Yarma Claus.
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All the Chrismukkah trimmings.
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Remember when Seth
made him this?
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It feels like forever ago.
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What feels like forever ago...
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is when my mom and I made this.
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My dad claimed
it was his favorite.
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Always demanded
that he got to hang it.
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It's your first
holiday without him.
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And the last one with
the boys in the house.
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Merry Chrismukkah, huh?
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Well, luckily, Chrismukkah
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has twice the resistance
of an ordinary holiday.
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It's just that this year
it just feels like
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it's flying by
so fast, Sandy.
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00:05:05,827 --> 00:05:07,568
And I just feel adrift.
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00:05:07,655 --> 00:05:09,874
Well, you've got your
business with Julie.
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00:05:09,961 --> 00:05:11,963
Hey, you want to feel
better about your own life,
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hanging out with Julie Cooper's
a great way to begin.
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I should check in on her.
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See how she's doing.
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You mark my words--
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this will be the best
Chrismukkah ever.
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You're beginning
to sound like Seth.
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00:05:21,930 --> 00:05:23,323
Well, it just means
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00:05:23,410 --> 00:05:25,673
you'll miss him less
when he's gone.
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MARISSA:
You guys, we have
to do something.
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We need a Chrismukkah miracle.
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Oh. Right.
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00:05:45,214 --> 00:05:48,130
A Chrismukkah miracle,
that's what I do.
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00:05:48,217 --> 00:05:49,610
Okay. Um...
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00:05:49,697 --> 00:05:51,568
How 'bout if we...
143
00:05:51,655 --> 00:05:52,700
No.
144
00:05:52,787 --> 00:05:53,962
No.
145
00:05:54,049 --> 00:05:55,485
What if...?!
146
00:05:55,572 --> 00:05:57,879
No. I know!
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00:05:57,966 --> 00:06:01,186
Stu-pid.
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00:06:01,273 --> 00:06:03,885
I can actually
see the wheels turning.
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00:06:03,972 --> 00:06:05,365
Well, how much
can surgery be?
150
00:06:05,452 --> 00:06:06,627
It's a few grand
at least.
151
00:06:06,714 --> 00:06:08,585
If any of you were even
remotely Jewish,
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00:06:08,672 --> 00:06:13,111
I would just say we could pool
our bar mitzvah money, but...
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00:06:13,198 --> 00:06:15,244
Holy crap, that's it.What's it?
154
00:06:15,331 --> 00:06:17,246
N... oh, n-n-n-n-no.
155
00:06:17,333 --> 00:06:18,421
Yes.
No way, dude.
156
00:06:18,508 --> 00:06:19,901
Yes way, dude.No.
157
00:06:19,988 --> 00:06:21,468
Yes way, dude.I'm sorry. I can't.
158
00:06:21,555 --> 00:06:22,991
I won't.
Will.
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00:06:23,078 --> 00:06:23,861
I'm not having it.
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00:06:23,948 --> 00:06:24,862
Having what?
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00:06:24,949 --> 00:06:27,343
A bar mitzvah.
162
00:06:27,430 --> 00:06:28,605
Ryan gets bar mitzvahed.
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00:06:28,692 --> 00:06:29,954
Now that is funny.
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00:06:30,041 --> 00:06:31,521
Yeah, see?
Summer's laughing.
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No, that's just gas.
Now listen...
Hey!
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this wouldn't be an
ordinary bar mitzvah.
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You know what
this would be?
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00:06:35,917 --> 00:06:37,875
Wait for it...
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00:06:37,962 --> 00:06:39,442
Wait for it...
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00:06:39,529 --> 00:06:41,401
A Chrismukkah bar mitzvahkah.
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00:06:41,488 --> 00:06:43,228
Spell that, dude.
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00:06:43,315 --> 00:06:43,968
That's crazy.
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00:06:44,055 --> 00:06:45,013
Yeah?
174
00:06:45,100 --> 00:06:46,884
So crazy it just might work.
175
00:06:46,971 --> 00:06:48,756
So, we throw a big party...
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00:06:48,843 --> 00:06:50,975
And Ryan gets the money
from the bar mitzvah?
177
00:06:52,063 --> 00:06:53,151
And then we can
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00:06:53,238 --> 00:06:54,718
spend it on Johnny's surgery.
179
00:06:54,805 --> 00:06:56,154
So how's this gonna work?
Am I just gonna
180
00:06:56,241 --> 00:06:57,504
stand in front of Newport
and sing Hebrew?
181
00:06:57,591 --> 00:06:59,506
You chant.
And hell yes.
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00:06:59,593 --> 00:07:01,116
What kind of centerpieces
should we get?
183
00:07:01,203 --> 00:07:02,291
I don't know.
Band or DJ?
184
00:07:02,378 --> 00:07:03,901
A DJ with dancers.Yeah.
185
00:07:03,988 --> 00:07:05,120
I like the Pussycat Dolls.
186
00:07:05,207 --> 00:07:06,164
Oh, my God, you're serious.
187
00:07:06,251 --> 00:07:07,731
We can get so many
cool things.
188
00:07:07,818 --> 00:07:09,994
We can get Herkel
the Jewish Clown.
Herkel?
189
00:07:10,081 --> 00:07:11,300
DJ Goldsteinberger.
190
00:07:19,003 --> 00:07:20,657
[ knocking]
191
00:07:20,744 --> 00:07:24,313
I told you guys I'm not going
to your Christmas party.
192
00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:27,229
Even if you are
deep frying a ham.
193
00:07:30,885 --> 00:07:32,103
Well, deep fried ham
sounds delicious.
194
00:07:32,190 --> 00:07:34,628
Kirsten, um...
195
00:07:34,715 --> 00:07:37,282
I thought we weren't
doing any business
196
00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:38,458
until after the new year?
197
00:07:38,545 --> 00:07:39,937
I didn't come here for business.
198
00:07:40,024 --> 00:07:41,417
Oh, just happened to be
in the neighborhood, huh?
199
00:07:41,504 --> 00:07:43,158
I came to see how you were.
200
00:07:43,245 --> 00:07:44,464
I'm great.
201
00:07:46,291 --> 00:07:48,424
Some of the neighbors are having
cockfights in an hour.
202
00:07:48,511 --> 00:07:50,992
Using stray dogs.
It's a holiday tradition.
203
00:07:51,079 --> 00:07:53,037
My money's on
the feisty weimaraner.
204
00:07:53,124 --> 00:07:54,299
Good.
205
00:07:54,386 --> 00:07:56,954
'Cause I'm awful.
206
00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:00,610
I'm spitting Skoal into a can,
207
00:08:00,697 --> 00:08:02,438
drinking wine
from a bottle I unscrewed
208
00:08:02,525 --> 00:08:04,832
and living in a home
that, if I wanted to,
209
00:08:04,919 --> 00:08:06,137
I could put into reverse.
210
00:08:06,224 --> 00:08:08,096
I'm beyond awful.
211
00:08:08,183 --> 00:08:10,228
You're at least gonna spend the
holidays with Marissa, right?
212
00:08:10,315 --> 00:08:11,534
You know, we were,
213
00:08:11,621 --> 00:08:14,145
but the Four Seasons
in Maui is booked.
214
00:08:14,232 --> 00:08:15,930
Haven't told her?
215
00:08:16,017 --> 00:08:18,802
What, that her mom's now
a Jeff Foxworthy fan?
216
00:08:18,889 --> 00:08:20,717
She thinks
our new oceanfront condo
217
00:08:20,804 --> 00:08:22,153
is undergoing a remodel.
218
00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:24,982
Julie, what are you gonna do?
219
00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:26,810
I'm gonna let her have her fun.
220
00:08:26,897 --> 00:08:29,117
And I will be miserable.
221
00:08:29,204 --> 00:08:31,859
Well, misery loves company.
222
00:08:49,790 --> 00:08:50,573
Hey.
223
00:08:50,660 --> 00:08:51,835
Hi.
224
00:08:51,922 --> 00:08:54,621
Dr. Roberts.
225
00:08:54,708 --> 00:08:56,405
Hello.
Hi, how are you?
226
00:08:56,492 --> 00:08:58,189
I'm good, Seth.
How are you?
227
00:08:58,276 --> 00:09:01,671
Great. I'm with your daughter
so, how could I not be great?
228
00:09:03,325 --> 00:09:04,805
Plus the Angels won.
229
00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:07,068
Looking pretty good
this year, hmm?
230
00:09:07,155 --> 00:09:09,331
Baseball season ended
months ago, Seth.
231
00:09:09,418 --> 00:09:11,638
But the market is up. Yes?
232
00:09:12,900 --> 00:09:14,075
No?
233
00:09:14,162 --> 00:09:15,903
It's a good time
for the market?
234
00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:17,078
Yes? No?
235
00:09:17,165 --> 00:09:18,645
It's good.
It's bad?
236
00:09:18,732 --> 00:09:20,734
It's a bad time
for the market.
Cohen?
237
00:09:20,821 --> 00:09:22,213
Why don't you go comb out
Princess Sparkle's tail.
238
00:09:22,300 --> 00:09:23,214
I know that relaxes you.
239
00:09:23,301 --> 00:09:24,085
What?
240
00:09:24,172 --> 00:09:26,087
Summer, what are you...?
241
00:09:26,174 --> 00:09:28,132
What are you talking about?
I would never...
242
00:09:29,394 --> 00:09:31,005
Is the comb where I left it?
243
00:09:31,092 --> 00:09:32,180
Yeah.
244
00:09:32,267 --> 00:09:33,181
Okay.
245
00:09:38,752 --> 00:09:39,491
How are you, sweetheart?
246
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,145
Oh, I'm good.
247
00:09:41,232 --> 00:09:42,799
I just had a trial run
at the Christmas tree lot.
248
00:09:42,886 --> 00:09:44,192
I helped pick out
the Cohens' tree.
249
00:09:44,279 --> 00:09:46,020
Ah.
Oh, is what's
her name around?
250
00:09:46,107 --> 00:09:48,196
I thought maybe we could all
go later and pick out ours?
251
00:09:48,283 --> 00:09:49,240
Your stepmother?
252
00:09:49,327 --> 00:09:50,981
She's out of town.
253
00:09:51,068 --> 00:09:54,071
She's meeting with the
maharishi in New Delhi.
254
00:09:54,158 --> 00:09:55,856
She wants to get centered
for the new year.
255
00:09:55,943 --> 00:09:57,335
Mm.
256
00:09:57,422 --> 00:10:00,338
So, when she's here
she's not really here,
257
00:10:00,425 --> 00:10:02,123
but now she's really not here?
258
00:10:02,210 --> 00:10:03,733
We have each other.
259
00:10:03,820 --> 00:10:05,996
And I've got
a ton of work.
260
00:10:06,083 --> 00:10:08,433
Well, can't tummy tucks wait?
It's the holidays.
261
00:10:09,696 --> 00:10:11,436
Aren't you the least bit bummed
262
00:10:11,523 --> 00:10:13,482
that your wife ditched us?
263
00:10:13,569 --> 00:10:15,092
I'm too busy.
264
00:10:15,179 --> 00:10:18,835
I really haven't had the chance
to be bummed.
265
00:10:18,922 --> 00:10:21,316
I've got to be off
to the O.R.
266
00:10:21,403 --> 00:10:23,187
When you want to get that tree,
you just let me know.
267
00:10:23,274 --> 00:10:24,406
Bye, Dad.
268
00:10:29,977 --> 00:10:31,979
Nice! That was sick!
269
00:10:32,066 --> 00:10:33,328
He hasn't moved all day.
270
00:10:34,677 --> 00:10:37,549
Johnny, your friends
are here.
271
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:38,768
Hey, man.
Hey.
272
00:10:38,855 --> 00:10:40,291
Hey.
273
00:10:40,378 --> 00:10:42,554
This is when me and Chili
went down to Costa Rica.
274
00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:44,208
It was the greatest trip
of my life.
275
00:10:44,295 --> 00:10:45,514
Now it's the most depressing.
276
00:10:45,601 --> 00:10:46,776
Well, we have some good news.
277
00:10:46,863 --> 00:10:49,213
Yeah?
I could use some of that.
278
00:10:49,300 --> 00:10:50,737
Yeah, well, you're gonna
have the surgery.
279
00:10:50,824 --> 00:10:52,129
Yeah, we're gonna
throw a party.
280
00:10:52,216 --> 00:10:53,435
Well, a fund raiser.
281
00:10:53,522 --> 00:10:55,263
I mean, we have them
all the time
282
00:10:55,350 --> 00:10:56,830
so it's not really
a big deal.
283
00:10:56,917 --> 00:10:58,483
But everyone in Newport
usually comes.
284
00:10:58,570 --> 00:10:59,571
Yeah, we'll raise the money.
285
00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:01,095
So, I'm like a charity case now?
286
00:11:02,705 --> 00:11:04,272
No, it's not like that.
287
00:11:04,359 --> 00:11:05,752
The rich people
pay for the poor kid.
288
00:11:05,839 --> 00:11:07,188
How's it not like that?
289
00:11:07,275 --> 00:11:08,189
We're trying to help.
290
00:11:08,276 --> 00:11:09,581
I appreciate that.
291
00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:11,235
But I've always
taken care of myself.
292
00:11:11,322 --> 00:11:12,802
Okay, all right.
293
00:11:12,889 --> 00:11:14,282
But now is not the time
to be proud.
294
00:11:14,369 --> 00:11:16,937
Hey, man,
if anyone should understand...
295
00:11:19,940 --> 00:11:22,551
Look, thanks,
but, no, thanks, all right?
296
00:11:22,638 --> 00:11:24,161
I should probably lay down.
297
00:11:24,248 --> 00:11:25,206
My knee's killing me.
298
00:11:25,293 --> 00:11:28,078
Thanks for stopping by.
299
00:11:39,437 --> 00:11:40,656
I don't care.
300
00:11:40,743 --> 00:11:42,092
Ryan's still getting
a bar mitzvah.
301
00:11:42,179 --> 00:11:44,007
Come on, the whole point
was to help Johnny.
302
00:11:44,094 --> 00:11:45,443
Maybe, uh, to you,
303
00:11:45,530 --> 00:11:46,357
but do any of you remember
304
00:11:46,444 --> 00:11:48,403
my bar mitzvah?
305
00:11:50,013 --> 00:11:51,362
Wait, wasn't that
Luke's birthday?
306
00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:52,668
We played paint ball.
307
00:11:52,755 --> 00:11:53,495
That was so much fun.
308
00:11:53,582 --> 00:11:55,149
Yeah, that was fun.
309
00:11:55,236 --> 00:11:55,889
Apparently for the entire
13-year-old population
310
00:11:55,976 --> 00:11:57,804
of Orange County.
311
00:11:57,891 --> 00:11:59,631
None of whom happened to swing
by Temple Beth'el that day.
312
00:11:59,719 --> 00:12:00,763
But you know what?
313
00:12:00,850 --> 00:12:02,156
Now, I'm gonna get a do-over.
314
00:12:02,243 --> 00:12:04,027
I just wish
he'd let us help him.
315
00:12:04,114 --> 00:12:05,550
Well, he doesn't want to be
our charity case.
316
00:12:05,637 --> 00:12:06,682
Poor guy.
317
00:12:06,769 --> 00:12:08,902
Slight of build and on crutches.
318
00:12:08,989 --> 00:12:11,165
He's kind of like
our very own Tiny Tim.
319
00:12:11,252 --> 00:12:12,819
[ sighing]:
He was pretty upset
yesterday.
320
00:12:12,906 --> 00:12:14,821
But he'd just gotten
the news so...
321
00:12:14,908 --> 00:12:17,258
Yeah, maybe if he just thinks
about it he'll change his mind.
322
00:12:17,345 --> 00:12:19,216
Exactly.So, it's on.
323
00:12:19,303 --> 00:12:20,609
MARISSA:
All right, well, you guys
keep working on it.
324
00:12:20,696 --> 00:12:22,045
I'm gonna go talk to him.
325
00:12:22,132 --> 00:12:23,046
All right.
326
00:12:23,133 --> 00:12:24,482
Meet you at the diner.
327
00:12:24,569 --> 00:12:25,919
Bye.
328
00:12:27,572 --> 00:12:28,835
We only have
one hurdle left
329
00:12:28,922 --> 00:12:30,010
before you become a man.
330
00:12:30,097 --> 00:12:32,055
A bar mitzvah for Ryan?
331
00:12:32,142 --> 00:12:34,231
Ooh, it just makes me
feel all tingly
hearing you say it.
332
00:12:36,103 --> 00:12:37,974
Do you have any idea
how offensive this is?
333
00:12:38,061 --> 00:12:41,021
I'm not trying
to offend, just help.
334
00:12:41,108 --> 00:12:43,023
Well, you've gotta be Jewish
to be bar mitzvahed.
335
00:12:43,110 --> 00:12:44,024
Let's just start there.
336
00:12:44,111 --> 00:12:45,982
Why are you guys doing this?
337
00:12:46,069 --> 00:12:47,984
Our friend, Johnny,
he can't afford knee surgery.
338
00:12:48,071 --> 00:12:49,029
It's like a fund-raiser.
339
00:12:49,116 --> 00:12:50,552
Which is where we need you, Mom.
340
00:12:50,639 --> 00:12:52,119
It's a sacred
religious event.
341
00:12:52,206 --> 00:12:54,861
A tradition that marks
a Jewish child's obligation
342
00:12:54,948 --> 00:12:55,731
to observe
343
00:12:55,818 --> 00:12:56,601
the Ten Commandments.
344
00:12:56,688 --> 00:12:58,299
I'm sorry
345
00:12:58,386 --> 00:12:59,343
and that's a problem
with the Jews
right there.
346
00:12:59,430 --> 00:13:01,302
We have no concept of marketing.
347
00:13:01,389 --> 00:13:03,478
You're on thin ice. Now, listen to me,
a long time ago,
348
00:13:03,565 --> 00:13:06,046
Mom's team allowed
Christmas to be
about reindeers
349
00:13:06,133 --> 00:13:08,265
and snowmen
and Tim Allen movies.
350
00:13:08,352 --> 00:13:10,050
And I would say
that that's a pretty
religious holiday.
351
00:13:10,137 --> 00:13:11,312
The birth of Christ?
352
00:13:11,399 --> 00:13:12,139
I'd say so.
353
00:13:12,226 --> 00:13:14,010
You betcha.
354
00:13:14,097 --> 00:13:17,144
Well, now, the bar mitzvah is
our greatest export possibility.
355
00:13:17,231 --> 00:13:19,233
It's got huge crossover
potential.
356
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:21,017
It's an honorary bar mitzvah.
357
00:13:21,104 --> 00:13:23,019
It's a Christmas-kah bar
mitzvah-kah.
358
00:13:23,106 --> 00:13:25,326
I like it.
359
00:13:25,413 --> 00:13:27,458
And they're helping
their friend.
360
00:13:27,545 --> 00:13:29,243
But we need your blessing.That's right.
361
00:13:29,330 --> 00:13:30,505
The club is throwing
a holiday party anyway.
362
00:13:30,592 --> 00:13:31,680
We'll hijack it.
363
00:13:31,767 --> 00:13:33,029
We'll just tell the Newpsies
364
00:13:33,116 --> 00:13:34,509
that we're raising money
for the hospital.
365
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:37,120
Sandy, it could be really fun.
366
00:13:38,382 --> 00:13:39,688
It's honorary.
367
00:13:39,775 --> 00:13:41,255
Hey.
368
00:13:41,342 --> 00:13:42,430
Minimal Hebrew.
369
00:13:42,517 --> 00:13:43,605
Which I'm fine with.
370
00:13:43,692 --> 00:13:45,433
No tallis,no Hallel.
371
00:13:45,520 --> 00:13:47,000
No Tefillin.
372
00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:49,132
Hey, as long as people
are dancing to "YMCA"
373
00:13:49,219 --> 00:13:50,699
and handing over envelopes
of cash, we're in.
374
00:13:50,786 --> 00:13:52,005
Then so are we.
375
00:13:52,092 --> 00:13:53,789
Mazel Tov,buddy.
376
00:13:53,876 --> 00:13:55,182
[ door creaks]
377
00:14:01,666 --> 00:14:02,929
Hey,
378
00:14:03,016 --> 00:14:04,104
what are
you doing?
379
00:14:04,191 --> 00:14:05,279
Solitaire.
380
00:14:06,193 --> 00:14:09,196
Are you winning?
381
00:14:09,283 --> 00:14:11,067
There's nothing worse
than losing to yourself, huh?
382
00:14:13,374 --> 00:14:15,115
You got some time to talk?
383
00:14:15,202 --> 00:14:16,594
Actually, I'm kinda busy.
384
00:14:16,681 --> 00:14:18,379
I can see that.
385
00:14:18,466 --> 00:14:21,164
No, I'm serious.
386
00:14:21,251 --> 00:14:23,514
What's your problem, Johnny?
387
00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:25,516
I mean, you don't want help
from anyone?
388
00:14:25,603 --> 00:14:26,691
Or you just don't want help
from me?
389
00:14:26,778 --> 00:14:29,216
My problem is my problem.
390
00:14:31,522 --> 00:14:33,002
[ cell phone rings]
391
00:14:33,089 --> 00:14:34,177
I'm sorry.
I've gotta take this.
392
00:14:34,264 --> 00:14:36,266
I can wait.
393
00:14:36,353 --> 00:14:38,138
It's private.
394
00:14:43,404 --> 00:14:44,622
Hey...
395
00:14:44,709 --> 00:14:47,799
actually it's not
a good time.
396
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,018
You know what?
It's fine.
397
00:14:49,105 --> 00:14:50,367
I'll go.
398
00:14:50,454 --> 00:14:52,195
Marissa...
399
00:14:52,282 --> 00:14:53,936
Sorry, okay?
400
00:14:56,591 --> 00:14:58,071
Yeah, sure,
I can meet you.
401
00:15:03,380 --> 00:15:05,165
I can't believe this is you.
402
00:15:05,252 --> 00:15:06,209
Hard to believe I was
once skinny and awkward.
403
00:15:06,296 --> 00:15:07,080
I know.
404
00:15:07,167 --> 00:15:08,342
No, but-but seriously.
405
00:15:08,429 --> 00:15:10,213
You went out in public
like this?
406
00:15:10,300 --> 00:15:13,521
It's one of the unfortunate
truths of the bar mitzvah, Ryan.
407
00:15:13,608 --> 00:15:15,131
It's the most awkward time
408
00:15:15,218 --> 00:15:16,263
in a young, Jewish boy's life.
409
00:15:16,350 --> 00:15:17,612
But also the most photographed.
410
00:15:17,699 --> 00:15:19,266
Hmm... Is there
a videotape, too?
411
00:15:19,353 --> 00:15:21,485
You have to kill me first.
Hey...
412
00:15:21,572 --> 00:15:24,358
My archery award
from Camp Takahalmac,
413
00:15:24,445 --> 00:15:26,751
my clay hot dog I made
in seventh grade,
414
00:15:26,838 --> 00:15:28,928
my diorama of I Know Why
the Caged Bird Sings...
415
00:15:29,015 --> 00:15:32,061
There we go.
416
00:15:32,148 --> 00:15:33,454
This is the CD I trained with.
417
00:15:33,541 --> 00:15:34,934
Rabbi Gutterman,
418
00:15:35,021 --> 00:15:36,022
he does a lovely job.
419
00:15:36,109 --> 00:15:37,588
And very easy
for you to mimic.
420
00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:39,286
Ooh, I don't know
if I can do this, man.
421
00:15:39,373 --> 00:15:40,765
It'll be over
before you know it.
422
00:15:40,852 --> 00:15:42,767
Listen, you just chant
a little Torah,
423
00:15:42,854 --> 00:15:43,638
you dance
a little horah
424
00:15:43,725 --> 00:15:45,683
And then we're golden.
425
00:15:45,770 --> 00:15:47,250
As soon as you hear "That's
What Friends Are For"
you're done.
426
00:15:47,337 --> 00:15:48,077
That song's Jewish?
427
00:15:48,164 --> 00:15:49,513
It mind as well be.
428
00:15:49,600 --> 00:15:50,732
It's a staple
of every bar mitzvah.
429
00:15:50,819 --> 00:15:52,255
It's you and all your friends,
430
00:15:52,342 --> 00:15:53,778
your arms around each other,
swaying.
431
00:15:53,865 --> 00:15:55,128
It's awesome.
432
00:15:55,215 --> 00:15:56,259
I thought all the kids
you invited
433
00:15:56,346 --> 00:15:57,391
went to Luke's birthday party?
434
00:15:57,478 --> 00:15:59,262
It's hypothetically awesome.
435
00:15:59,349 --> 00:16:01,047
But tomorrow
we're gonna rewrite history.
436
00:16:01,134 --> 00:16:03,092
Well, I guess I should go study.
437
00:16:03,179 --> 00:16:04,485
And then I gotta meet up
with Marissa...
438
00:16:04,572 --> 00:16:06,966
Hey!
No slacking with the lady, okay?
439
00:16:07,053 --> 00:16:08,793
You got 24 hours
to learn Hebrew,
440
00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:10,447
to read the Old Testament...
441
00:16:10,534 --> 00:16:13,494
And humiliate myself in front
of the whole town.
442
00:16:13,581 --> 00:16:14,930
It's better than humiliating
yourself in front of no one.
443
00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:16,627
Trust me.
444
00:16:16,714 --> 00:16:18,194
KIRSTEN:
Oh, Julie, this is just
what we need
445
00:16:18,281 --> 00:16:20,675
to lift us out
of our holiday blues.
446
00:16:20,762 --> 00:16:21,937
We're throwing
a party.
447
00:16:22,024 --> 00:16:23,156
It's called
a bar mitzvah-kah
448
00:16:23,243 --> 00:16:24,244
which sounds delightful.
449
00:16:24,331 --> 00:16:25,506
Seth is definitely
one of a kind.
450
00:16:25,593 --> 00:16:26,986
But how's
this gonna work?
451
00:16:27,073 --> 00:16:28,422
We raise a little money
for the hospital.
452
00:16:28,509 --> 00:16:30,250
They throw in an
arthroscopic surgery.
453
00:16:30,337 --> 00:16:31,816
And they're gonna
go for that?
454
00:16:31,903 --> 00:16:32,992
Julie Cooper?
455
00:16:35,124 --> 00:16:36,517
Hi, doctor.
Have we met?
456
00:16:36,604 --> 00:16:37,909
Well, I certainly hope so.
457
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:39,259
Your daughter's living
at my house.
458
00:16:39,346 --> 00:16:41,217
Oh, Neil, I didn't
even recognize you.
459
00:16:41,304 --> 00:16:42,610
Hi, Neil.
how are you?
460
00:16:42,697 --> 00:16:43,872
I'm good, Kirsten.
Busy.
461
00:16:43,959 --> 00:16:45,091
Well, I should thank you again
462
00:16:45,178 --> 00:16:46,309
for letting Marissa live
with you.
463
00:16:46,396 --> 00:16:47,702
Oh, there's no need
to thank me.
464
00:16:47,789 --> 00:16:49,660
I know how unnerving
a remodel can be.
465
00:16:49,747 --> 00:16:51,836
Uh, do you know where
the administrator's
office is?
466
00:16:51,923 --> 00:16:52,968
Dr. Singh?
467
00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:54,665
What do you want
with that crank?
468
00:16:54,752 --> 00:16:56,406
We're throwing a little
fund-raiser for the hospital.
469
00:16:56,493 --> 00:16:58,539
He's definitely not the guy
to see about a party.
470
00:16:58,626 --> 00:16:59,757
Besides, he's
in the Bahamas.
471
00:16:59,844 --> 00:17:00,932
You're kidding?
472
00:17:01,020 --> 00:17:02,717
But maybe
I can help you.
473
00:17:02,804 --> 00:17:04,327
I'm head of plastic surgery
and I'm on the board.
474
00:17:04,414 --> 00:17:05,502
Yes... well...
475
00:17:05,589 --> 00:17:06,851
It's called
a bar mitzvah-kah.
476
00:17:11,639 --> 00:17:13,815
I like to introduce you
to my father-in-law.
477
00:17:13,902 --> 00:17:15,164
And here's the nana, my mother.
478
00:17:15,251 --> 00:17:16,774
Well, hello.
479
00:17:16,861 --> 00:17:18,820
My father-in-law,
Caleb Nichol.Shalom.
480
00:17:23,825 --> 00:17:25,566
Hey, Seth.
481
00:17:25,653 --> 00:17:27,350
You wanna dance,
sweetheart?
482
00:17:27,437 --> 00:17:30,397
This song is called "That's
What Friends Are For."
483
00:17:30,484 --> 00:17:31,659
It's for your friends.
484
00:17:31,746 --> 00:17:34,749
Well,
we're your friends.
485
00:17:34,836 --> 00:17:37,491
This is my funeral,
not my bar mitzvah.
486
00:17:37,578 --> 00:17:38,927
No one showed up.
487
00:17:39,014 --> 00:17:41,669
And you said Summer Roberts
was coming.
488
00:17:41,756 --> 00:17:43,801
She RSVP'd.
489
00:17:43,888 --> 00:17:45,542
[ whispering]:
So did a lot of kids.
490
00:17:45,629 --> 00:17:47,327
I hate it here.
491
00:17:47,414 --> 00:17:48,589
Ow.
492
00:17:48,676 --> 00:17:49,938
KIRSTEN:
What's wrong honey?
493
00:17:50,025 --> 00:17:52,158
My rapid pallet expander
is killing me.
494
00:17:55,770 --> 00:17:57,902
Hey, Portnoy,
how's it going?
495
00:17:57,989 --> 00:17:59,382
Ah, I gotta meet Marissa.
496
00:17:59,469 --> 00:18:00,775
I'm late.
Lost track of time.
497
00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:02,559
That's the Torah
for you right there.
498
00:18:02,646 --> 00:18:04,779
Once you start unscrolling
it's really hard to stop.
499
00:18:04,866 --> 00:18:06,215
I'm a dead man tomorrow
by the way.
500
00:18:06,302 --> 00:18:08,130
Yeah, well, listen,
in all seriousness,
501
00:18:08,217 --> 00:18:09,218
I think it's pretty great
what you're doing for Johnny,
502
00:18:09,305 --> 00:18:10,524
considering everything.
503
00:18:10,611 --> 00:18:11,655
Yeah, maybe it'll make me
a saint.
504
00:18:11,742 --> 00:18:12,961
Jews don't believe in saints,
505
00:18:13,048 --> 00:18:15,485
just really good
stand-up comics.
506
00:18:20,882 --> 00:18:21,839
[ mouthing words to "YMCA"]
507
00:18:26,322 --> 00:18:27,802
Hey, I'm waiting for someone.
508
00:18:27,889 --> 00:18:29,108
It'll just be a minute.
509
00:19:12,586 --> 00:19:13,978
Hey, Johnny.
510
00:19:15,545 --> 00:19:18,505
Are you okay?
511
00:19:18,592 --> 00:19:20,159
Not really.
512
00:19:21,769 --> 00:19:23,640
Hey, look,
you're gonna get better.
513
00:19:23,727 --> 00:19:27,035
If I don't...
my whole life I've
dreamt of one thing.
514
00:19:27,122 --> 00:19:29,864
I was so close
to making that happen.
515
00:19:29,951 --> 00:19:33,041
It was gonna
change my life.
516
00:19:33,128 --> 00:19:34,825
That can still happen.
517
00:19:50,406 --> 00:19:53,061
I'm sorry I've been
taking this out on you.
518
00:19:53,148 --> 00:19:54,062
I know I've made
things weird.
519
00:19:54,149 --> 00:19:56,107
Sometimes...
520
00:19:56,195 --> 00:19:59,154
knowing that you're pulling
for me...
521
00:19:59,241 --> 00:20:00,982
It's the only thing
that keeps me going.
522
00:20:01,069 --> 00:20:04,725
Hey... we're gonna
get through this.
523
00:20:04,812 --> 00:20:06,596
Okay?
524
00:20:06,683 --> 00:20:08,946
We'll get through it together.
525
00:20:31,969 --> 00:20:33,101
What do you mean
you're not doing it?
526
00:20:33,188 --> 00:20:34,058
I mean I'm done helping
this kid.
527
00:20:34,145 --> 00:20:35,103
Why?
Did something happen?
528
00:20:35,190 --> 00:20:36,757
Oh, something's gonna happen.
529
00:20:36,844 --> 00:20:37,758
Well, can't it just wait till
after the holidays?
530
00:20:37,845 --> 00:20:38,802
No, it can't.
531
00:20:38,889 --> 00:20:40,239
Johnny's in love
with Marissa
532
00:20:40,326 --> 00:20:41,327
and she can't seem
to get enough of the guy.
533
00:20:41,414 --> 00:20:42,589
Oh, sounds like there's
534
00:20:42,676 --> 00:20:44,199
a low-grade
relationship issue brewing.
535
00:20:44,286 --> 00:20:46,070
Very high-grade.
It's level five.
536
00:20:46,157 --> 00:20:47,115
What's your problem?
537
00:20:47,202 --> 00:20:48,725
There is no problem.
538
00:20:48,812 --> 00:20:52,294
I'm just not humiliating
myself tonight.
539
00:20:52,381 --> 00:20:55,036
Wh...? You're quitting?
540
00:20:55,123 --> 00:20:56,298
This is bad news.
541
00:20:57,386 --> 00:20:59,127
Great news.
542
00:20:59,214 --> 00:21:01,216
So, Neil Roberts cleared the
fund-raiser with the board.
543
00:21:01,303 --> 00:21:02,522
Julie and I
talked to the Newpsies.
544
00:21:02,609 --> 00:21:04,698
We're all set for tonight.
545
00:21:04,785 --> 00:21:07,178
You were right.
546
00:21:07,266 --> 00:21:09,268
This is gonna be the best
Christmas-kah every.
547
00:21:09,355 --> 00:21:10,660
I gotta go set up.
548
00:21:12,445 --> 00:21:15,274
That was remarkable timing--
my mom right there.
549
00:21:15,361 --> 00:21:17,667
Oy, humbugs.
550
00:21:17,754 --> 00:21:22,542
Well, sweetheart, I have to say,
your mom taught you well.
551
00:21:22,629 --> 00:21:25,632
She used to spend hours picking
out a tree.
552
00:21:25,719 --> 00:21:27,547
Seeing how dry the pines were.
553
00:21:27,634 --> 00:21:29,723
Hmm, if it's dry say goodbye.
554
00:21:29,810 --> 00:21:31,681
How much sap was on the bark.
555
00:21:31,768 --> 00:21:33,596
Sticky, but critical.
556
00:21:33,683 --> 00:21:35,598
And how the tree looked with all
of your presents underneath it.
557
00:21:35,685 --> 00:21:39,167
Anything with presents
for me looks good.
558
00:21:39,254 --> 00:21:41,082
Hey, Dad?
559
00:21:41,169 --> 00:21:43,693
What, baby?
560
00:21:43,780 --> 00:21:45,304
Why did Mom leave?
561
00:21:50,352 --> 00:21:54,051
Well, I mean I was
only 13 years old.
562
00:21:54,138 --> 00:21:58,578
Your mom...
563
00:21:58,665 --> 00:22:01,885
Well, she just didn't like it
here with me, I guess.
564
00:22:04,148 --> 00:22:07,326
I remember when you told me
the news.
565
00:22:07,413 --> 00:22:09,850
I think that was the worse day
of my life.
566
00:22:09,937 --> 00:22:12,243
I know and you were already
upset with me
567
00:22:12,331 --> 00:22:13,462
'cause I didn't let you go to
Luke Ward's birthday party.
568
00:22:13,549 --> 00:22:15,334
Really?
569
00:22:15,421 --> 00:22:17,684
Yeah, you had already RSVP'd
to some other engagement.
570
00:22:21,209 --> 00:22:24,255
Oh, my God. Yeah.
571
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:26,649
Not that it mattered.
572
00:22:26,736 --> 00:22:28,390
You didn't come out of your room
for three days.
573
00:22:28,477 --> 00:22:31,524
When you found out...
you cried.
574
00:22:41,360 --> 00:22:42,535
But we've done okay?
575
00:22:42,622 --> 00:22:45,320
Yeah.
576
00:22:45,407 --> 00:22:47,322
And your stepmother, she's very
sweet on you.
577
00:22:47,409 --> 00:22:50,238
That's because she's medicated.
578
00:22:50,325 --> 00:22:51,979
I'm sorry.
579
00:22:52,066 --> 00:22:55,243
I just miss Mom sometimes.
580
00:22:55,330 --> 00:22:56,592
I know.
581
00:22:56,679 --> 00:23:00,422
Me, too.
582
00:23:00,509 --> 00:23:04,034
I've got rounds.
I won't be long.
583
00:23:04,121 --> 00:23:05,688
Okay.
584
00:23:05,775 --> 00:23:06,689
Seth.
585
00:23:06,776 --> 00:23:09,518
Dr. Roberts.
586
00:23:09,605 --> 00:23:10,998
Did you see that?
587
00:23:11,085 --> 00:23:13,522
That was a breakthrough
moment for us.
588
00:23:13,609 --> 00:23:16,351
Everything okay?
589
00:23:16,438 --> 00:23:18,353
Yeah.
590
00:23:18,440 --> 00:23:20,137
It's just the holidays can
be hard, you know?
591
00:23:20,224 --> 00:23:21,269
Yeah, can I help?
592
00:23:23,445 --> 00:23:25,447
You already have.
593
00:23:29,886 --> 00:23:31,714
Hey, thanks for meeting me.
594
00:23:31,801 --> 00:23:33,324
Of course.
595
00:23:33,412 --> 00:23:36,371
After last night, you really
talked me off the ledge.
596
00:23:36,458 --> 00:23:38,112
Yeah.
597
00:23:38,199 --> 00:23:39,809
I kinda wanted to talk
about last night.
598
00:23:39,896 --> 00:23:41,855
I just feel weird
about what happened.
599
00:23:41,942 --> 00:23:43,160
Nothing happened.
600
00:23:43,247 --> 00:23:46,686
I mean, well, there was
a definite vibe.
601
00:23:46,773 --> 00:23:48,078
That I like you?
602
00:23:48,165 --> 00:23:49,471
It's not a vibe.
It's the truth.
603
00:23:49,558 --> 00:23:51,212
Which I've already
shared with you.
604
00:23:51,299 --> 00:23:52,474
Unintentionally,
but...
605
00:23:52,561 --> 00:23:54,433
you still seem to want
to hang out.
606
00:23:54,520 --> 00:23:57,610
I do... I just...
607
00:23:57,697 --> 00:23:59,350
I wanna stay friends.
608
00:23:59,438 --> 00:24:04,443
[ sighs] Can we...
start over?
609
00:24:04,530 --> 00:24:08,359
Yeah, of course.
I just...
610
00:24:08,447 --> 00:24:11,362
I mean, I kinda need to know
that everything's okay with you.
611
00:24:11,450 --> 00:24:16,324
My knee's screwed up and I give
off a vibe, but other than that.
612
00:24:16,411 --> 00:24:19,370
I mean, what were you doing
last night?
613
00:24:19,458 --> 00:24:22,417
'Cause I saw you out here
with this guy and...
614
00:24:22,504 --> 00:24:24,071
Look, I thought we
just made peace.
615
00:24:24,158 --> 00:24:25,507
I told you I'm
616
00:24:25,594 --> 00:24:27,335
taking care of things.
617
00:24:30,512 --> 00:24:32,601
What does that mean?It means...
618
00:24:32,688 --> 00:24:35,474
don't ask questions you don't
want answers to.
619
00:24:37,476 --> 00:24:38,912
Let's just leave it at that,
okay?
620
00:24:44,483 --> 00:24:47,050
SANDY: [ knocking ]
Hey, kid.
621
00:24:47,137 --> 00:24:49,139
You mind turning off
the TV?
622
00:24:49,226 --> 00:24:51,533
I don't really feel
like talking.
623
00:24:51,620 --> 00:24:53,535
Aw, that's good,
'cause I do.
624
00:24:53,622 --> 00:24:54,580
You can listen.
625
00:24:54,667 --> 00:24:55,842
[ turns off TV]
626
00:24:55,929 --> 00:24:57,539
That's right.
627
00:24:57,626 --> 00:25:00,455
It's time for the big Sandy
Cohen uplifting speech.
628
00:25:00,542 --> 00:25:02,196
Look, Sandy, I've got
my reasons.
629
00:25:02,283 --> 00:25:03,110
I'm sure you do.
630
00:25:03,197 --> 00:25:04,764
Just like I had mine
631
00:25:04,851 --> 00:25:05,634
when I didn't want you to do
this crazy thing.
632
00:25:05,721 --> 00:25:06,766
Sorry I let you down.
633
00:25:06,853 --> 00:25:07,897
Well, it's not just me.
634
00:25:07,984 --> 00:25:09,812
There's also Kirsten.
635
00:25:09,899 --> 00:25:11,335
She has her heart set on it.
636
00:25:11,422 --> 00:25:13,990
And the hospital--
they're all excited about it.
637
00:25:14,077 --> 00:25:17,603
And your friend Johnny, who--
whatever he's done--
638
00:25:17,690 --> 00:25:19,518
he could really use your help.
639
00:25:19,605 --> 00:25:21,084
You can still have the event.
640
00:25:21,171 --> 00:25:22,433
Just do it without me.
641
00:25:22,521 --> 00:25:24,827
Well, that'd be
missing the point.
642
00:25:24,914 --> 00:25:26,263
The whole thing
about a bar mitzvah
643
00:25:26,350 --> 00:25:27,482
is it's about becoming a man.
644
00:25:27,569 --> 00:25:29,484
Not that you aren't
one already.
645
00:25:29,571 --> 00:25:32,139
But, if there were ever a time
for an adult moment, this is it.
646
00:25:32,226 --> 00:25:34,358
Whatever's going on,
647
00:25:34,445 --> 00:25:36,578
set it aside
until after tonight.
648
00:25:36,665 --> 00:25:38,014
I'd really be swallowing
my pride.
649
00:25:38,101 --> 00:25:40,321
I'm not saying it tastes good,
but--
650
00:25:40,408 --> 00:25:41,627
Gotta do the
right thing.
651
00:25:41,714 --> 00:25:43,542
Yeah, feels like I do that
a lot.
652
00:25:43,629 --> 00:25:47,937
That's 'cause, Ryan Atwood,
you're a mensh.
653
00:25:48,024 --> 00:25:51,375
And after tonight, I'm gonna
tell you what that means.
654
00:26:05,259 --> 00:26:06,956
Gosh dammit.
655
00:26:07,043 --> 00:26:08,479
Oh.
Oh.
656
00:26:08,567 --> 00:26:10,612
Julie, what are you doing?
657
00:26:10,699 --> 00:26:11,221
We're supposed to
be setting up?
658
00:26:11,308 --> 00:26:13,049
Yeah, right.
659
00:26:13,136 --> 00:26:16,357
Well, I just felt like telling
overdressed, oversexed Newpsies
660
00:26:16,444 --> 00:26:18,664
how to hang streamers wasn't
gonna make me feel any better.
661
00:26:18,751 --> 00:26:20,317
And I thought we were
doing this for charity.
662
00:26:20,404 --> 00:26:22,798
Well, of course.
663
00:26:22,885 --> 00:26:25,584
It's just, I feel like the
Newpsies won't get me anymore.
664
00:26:25,671 --> 00:26:26,802
It's not like
I can have them over
665
00:26:26,889 --> 00:26:28,282
for Pop-tarts and cockfights.
666
00:26:28,369 --> 00:26:30,110
You're avoiding Marissa,
aren't you?
667
00:26:30,197 --> 00:26:34,680
I had no problem keeping other
secrets from her.
668
00:26:34,767 --> 00:26:36,333
Julie, tell her the truth.
669
00:26:36,420 --> 00:26:38,161
She's your daughter.
It's the holidays.
670
00:26:38,248 --> 00:26:41,425
You should be together.
671
00:26:41,512 --> 00:26:44,515
You're right.
672
00:26:44,603 --> 00:26:46,953
I'll go over there this evening
and do it.
673
00:26:58,399 --> 00:27:00,183
I haven't heard from you
all day.
674
00:27:00,270 --> 00:27:03,273
Been studying.
Big night tonight.
675
00:27:03,360 --> 00:27:05,536
Well, I thought we were gonna
have dinner last night.
676
00:27:05,624 --> 00:27:08,148
I had a lot of
Old Testament to cover.
677
00:27:08,235 --> 00:27:11,847
Well, I haven't heard you use
that one before.
678
00:27:13,806 --> 00:27:14,633
That's probably good anyway.
679
00:27:14,720 --> 00:27:15,677
How is that good?
680
00:27:15,764 --> 00:27:17,331
Because if you had shown up
681
00:27:17,418 --> 00:27:18,941
you might've seen me and Johnny
682
00:27:19,028 --> 00:27:21,944
and it might've seemed like
something it wasn't.
683
00:27:23,772 --> 00:27:25,687
I saw you guys.
684
00:27:27,428 --> 00:27:30,213
I have a bad habit of showing up
at the wrong time.
685
00:27:30,300 --> 00:27:33,608
Yeah, well nothing happened.
I promise.
686
00:27:33,695 --> 00:27:34,827
We were just talking.
687
00:27:34,914 --> 00:27:37,351
Looked like more than that.
688
00:27:37,438 --> 00:27:39,048
He's in bad shape.
689
00:27:40,528 --> 00:27:42,269
I'm worried about him.
690
00:27:42,356 --> 00:27:45,272
Well, I'm starting to be, too.
691
00:27:45,359 --> 00:27:46,577
What is this thing you have?
692
00:27:46,665 --> 00:27:47,883
What thing?
693
00:27:47,970 --> 00:27:50,712
Always helping
these kinds of guys.
694
00:27:50,799 --> 00:27:53,019
What...
695
00:27:53,106 --> 00:27:54,585
the wounded loner types?
696
00:27:56,413 --> 00:27:59,286
Sometimes they turn out
to be good guys.
697
00:28:00,766 --> 00:28:03,333
I don't have feelings
for Johnny.
698
00:28:03,420 --> 00:28:04,857
I'm just worried about him.
699
00:28:08,687 --> 00:28:10,993
I think he might be up to
something dangerous.
700
00:28:11,080 --> 00:28:13,909
Johnny doesn't seem like
the dangerous type.
701
00:28:13,996 --> 00:28:17,217
Yeah, well, he's scared.
702
00:28:17,304 --> 00:28:18,697
And desperate.
703
00:28:20,524 --> 00:28:22,352
What do you think it is?I don't know.
704
00:28:22,439 --> 00:28:24,746
I mean, dealing drugs?
705
00:28:24,833 --> 00:28:26,792
We're just so close
to helping him.
706
00:28:31,187 --> 00:28:34,538
[ sighs]
All right.
707
00:28:34,625 --> 00:28:35,931
All right, I'll talk to him.
708
00:28:36,018 --> 00:28:40,544
And, uh... I'll
see you tonight.
709
00:28:45,071 --> 00:28:48,596
So how's Johnny doing?
710
00:28:48,683 --> 00:28:50,250
You know, first
his girlfriend,
711
00:28:50,337 --> 00:28:52,034
then the accident.
712
00:28:52,121 --> 00:28:54,515
I just don't know what he would
do without all you guys.
713
00:28:54,602 --> 00:28:56,778
Well that's what friends are
for, right? Is he...?
714
00:28:56,865 --> 00:28:58,562
Yeah, his room's
just down the hall.
715
00:28:58,649 --> 00:28:59,607
Thanks.
716
00:29:02,392 --> 00:29:04,568
Johnny? Hey, man.
717
00:29:04,655 --> 00:29:06,440
Ryan?
718
00:29:06,527 --> 00:29:08,181
Hey, uh, I'll
just be a minute.
719
00:29:08,268 --> 00:29:10,792
Yeah.
720
00:29:10,879 --> 00:29:12,663
[ whispers]:
Take your time.
721
00:29:45,871 --> 00:29:47,133
Hey, man.
722
00:29:47,220 --> 00:29:49,265
Hey, sorry to show up
unannounced.
723
00:29:49,352 --> 00:29:50,963
Um... no prob.
724
00:29:51,050 --> 00:29:51,920
Is everything cool?
725
00:29:52,007 --> 00:29:53,356
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
726
00:29:53,443 --> 00:29:55,184
Actually, I'm just trying to,
uh...
727
00:29:55,271 --> 00:29:56,882
trying to get you to come
to this party.
728
00:29:56,969 --> 00:29:59,362
It's not still for me, right?No, no, no, no.
729
00:29:59,449 --> 00:30:02,626
We found a different cause.
I'm, um...
730
00:30:02,713 --> 00:30:04,585
I'm getting bar mitzvahed.
731
00:30:04,672 --> 00:30:05,891
You'd have to know Seth better.
732
00:30:05,978 --> 00:30:08,197
Well, um, thanks
for the invite, man,
733
00:30:08,284 --> 00:30:09,895
but I've got
some stuff to do, so...
734
00:30:09,982 --> 00:30:11,853
It'll be fun.
You could use some fun.
735
00:30:11,940 --> 00:30:13,550
Um... I really can't.
736
00:30:13,637 --> 00:30:15,204
Sure you can.
737
00:30:15,291 --> 00:30:16,815
Everyone wants to see you.
738
00:30:16,902 --> 00:30:17,946
Whatever you're doing,
it can wait, right?
739
00:30:21,820 --> 00:30:24,779
Um... Okay,
I just gotta get ready.
740
00:30:24,866 --> 00:30:26,650
I'll be five minutes.Great.
741
00:30:26,737 --> 00:30:29,828
I'm gonna embarrass myself in
front of a lot of people.
742
00:30:29,915 --> 00:30:31,177
Hey, man.
743
00:30:32,265 --> 00:30:34,658
Thanks.
744
00:30:34,745 --> 00:30:36,747
Yeah.
745
00:31:01,729 --> 00:31:03,731
Look at all them
signatures.
746
00:31:03,818 --> 00:31:05,907
Attendance is amazing.
747
00:31:05,994 --> 00:31:08,344
So, Cohen, no one came
to your bar mitzvah?
748
00:31:08,431 --> 00:31:10,390
Uh, not no one.
749
00:31:10,477 --> 00:31:12,087
The nanna came.
750
00:31:12,174 --> 00:31:14,785
Uh, Rabbi Gutterman swung by
after the ceremonies.
751
00:31:14,873 --> 00:31:16,700
That is so sad.
752
00:31:16,787 --> 00:31:18,833
Well, apparently me
in a yarmulke
753
00:31:18,920 --> 00:31:21,183
was not as enticing a draw
as Luke in camo pants.
754
00:31:21,270 --> 00:31:22,315
Hey, the photographer
has summoned us
755
00:31:22,402 --> 00:31:23,751
for our family photos.
756
00:31:23,838 --> 00:31:26,319
And Ryan, our orthodontist
has offered
757
00:31:26,406 --> 00:31:27,929
to take your braces off
for the big day.
758
00:31:28,016 --> 00:31:30,497
Ah, he couldn't have
done that for me?
759
00:31:30,584 --> 00:31:31,498
Hey.
760
00:31:34,327 --> 00:31:36,764
Don't let him out
of your sight, okay?
761
00:31:36,851 --> 00:31:38,374
You're okay with that?
762
00:31:38,461 --> 00:31:41,856
Yeah, well, till
I can figure out
what he's up to.
763
00:31:50,386 --> 00:31:53,694
Julie, look at you.
Whoa.
764
00:31:53,781 --> 00:31:54,956
I hope I'm not
disturbing you.
765
00:31:55,043 --> 00:31:55,783
Come on in.
766
00:31:55,870 --> 00:31:57,132
Thank you.
767
00:31:57,219 --> 00:31:59,047
I haven't been here
in so many years.
768
00:31:59,134 --> 00:32:00,657
I forgot how majestic
your home is.
769
00:32:00,744 --> 00:32:02,833
Well, luckily there
are a lot
770
00:32:02,921 --> 00:32:04,966
of aging vain people
in this town.
771
00:32:05,053 --> 00:32:06,576
Is Marissa here?
772
00:32:06,663 --> 00:32:07,838
I was hoping
to catch up with her.
773
00:32:07,926 --> 00:32:09,928
No, she already left
for the event.
774
00:32:10,015 --> 00:32:11,973
Oh, well.
775
00:32:12,060 --> 00:32:13,714
Just as well I suppose.
776
00:32:13,801 --> 00:32:15,281
Would you like a drink?
777
00:32:18,023 --> 00:32:19,807
Well, I think Marissa's
a great girl.
778
00:32:19,894 --> 00:32:21,461
She's very good
for Summer.
779
00:32:21,548 --> 00:32:23,767
Gives her an ally
in the house when
I'm working.
780
00:32:23,854 --> 00:32:26,901
Well, Marissa wasn't a fan
of my remarriage, either.
781
00:32:26,988 --> 00:32:29,599
But, hopefully,
I'll have her out
of your hair soon.
782
00:32:29,686 --> 00:32:30,774
Remodel's almost finished.
783
00:32:35,040 --> 00:32:36,911
Little white lies
we tell our kids.
784
00:32:36,998 --> 00:32:38,043
Excuse me?
785
00:32:38,130 --> 00:32:39,131
Well, I've been
telling Summer
786
00:32:39,218 --> 00:32:41,089
that everything
is great, too.
787
00:32:41,176 --> 00:32:43,874
Truth is I'm looking down the
barrel of divorce number two.
788
00:32:43,962 --> 00:32:45,354
Oh, Neil, I'm so sorry.
789
00:32:45,441 --> 00:32:47,139
No, don't be.
790
00:32:47,226 --> 00:32:49,880
The way my wife self-medicates,
she could be a pharmacist.
791
00:32:49,968 --> 00:32:51,186
Been miserable for years.
792
00:32:51,273 --> 00:32:53,667
I live in a trailer park.
793
00:32:55,669 --> 00:32:58,193
If only I could say that
to Marissa.
794
00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:02,154
Sometimes it's okay to keep
our kids out of harm's way.
795
00:33:02,241 --> 00:33:05,200
I just feel terrible
lying to her.
796
00:33:05,287 --> 00:33:06,549
We've come so far.
797
00:33:06,636 --> 00:33:08,812
You're remodeling your life.
798
00:33:08,899 --> 00:33:10,771
It's all about how you slice it.
799
00:33:10,858 --> 00:33:12,425
Yes, well, you are the surgeon.
800
00:33:14,644 --> 00:33:16,168
Do you have any interest
in a party?
801
00:33:18,735 --> 00:33:20,259
It's nice to see you again.
802
00:33:20,346 --> 00:33:22,043
Ryan, over here please.
803
00:33:22,130 --> 00:33:23,523
Everybody, eyes right
to the lens.
804
00:33:23,610 --> 00:33:24,828
Terrific.
805
00:33:24,915 --> 00:33:26,961
Let me show you
to your seats.
806
00:33:27,048 --> 00:33:29,616
I was born to usher.
807
00:33:29,703 --> 00:33:30,399
Marissa,
808
00:33:30,486 --> 00:33:31,487
come join us.
809
00:33:31,574 --> 00:33:32,619
You're practically family.
810
00:33:32,706 --> 00:33:33,881
I think
technically she is.
811
00:33:35,143 --> 00:33:36,231
I think that's true.
812
00:33:36,318 --> 00:33:38,277
Okay, everybody,
right here on two.
813
00:33:38,364 --> 00:33:39,278
One, two.
814
00:33:41,280 --> 00:33:43,195
Great, let's just have one
with the bar mitzvah boy.
815
00:33:45,327 --> 00:33:47,155
I'll be right back.
816
00:34:08,959 --> 00:34:11,092
How are you good people
of Newport Beach?
817
00:34:11,179 --> 00:34:15,923
Welcome to the first
and quite possibly the very last
818
00:34:16,010 --> 00:34:17,751
Chrismukkah bar mitzvakkah,
819
00:34:17,838 --> 00:34:19,796
a charity event for the Robbins
Heights Hospital.
820
00:34:19,883 --> 00:34:20,623
Hey.
Hey.
821
00:34:20,710 --> 00:34:21,276
Johnny's gone.
822
00:34:21,363 --> 00:34:23,148
What?
823
00:34:23,235 --> 00:34:25,759
Yeah, I lost him.
I don't know how,
but he can't be far.
824
00:34:25,846 --> 00:34:26,716
Okay, all right.
825
00:34:26,803 --> 00:34:27,369
I'll be right back.
826
00:34:27,456 --> 00:34:29,023
Okay.
827
00:34:29,110 --> 00:34:31,547
I hope you find it entertaining
and enlightening.
828
00:34:31,634 --> 00:34:34,855
And if not, we've thrown in
a big party for good measure.
829
00:34:34,942 --> 00:34:36,944
Now the young man who will soon
become a real man
830
00:34:37,031 --> 00:34:38,598
is Ryan Atwood.
831
00:34:38,685 --> 00:34:40,600
Now, I'm sure some of you
have heard of him,
832
00:34:40,687 --> 00:34:42,471
but none of you have seen him
like this.
833
00:34:42,558 --> 00:34:43,777
Let's here it for Ryan Atwood.
834
00:34:45,909 --> 00:34:47,172
Go, do something.
You gotta...
835
00:34:47,259 --> 00:34:48,869
No, no. I am not
reliving this.
836
00:34:48,956 --> 00:34:49,957
Once was horrible enough.
837
00:34:51,611 --> 00:34:53,308
Okay, come on.
Stop. Please?
838
00:34:59,445 --> 00:35:01,273
Seth Cohen. Hello.
839
00:35:01,360 --> 00:35:08,062
Uh, Ryan, forgot his glasses
so he's going to be right back.
840
00:35:08,149 --> 00:35:10,282
SANDY:
Ryan doesn't wear
glasses.
841
00:35:10,369 --> 00:35:11,718
He does when he's reading
from right to left.
842
00:35:24,818 --> 00:35:28,126
And so that is how I came up
with Chrismukkah.
843
00:35:28,213 --> 00:35:31,694
Because you can't have "Chris"
without a little "Mukkah."
844
00:35:31,781 --> 00:35:34,088
Huh?
845
00:35:34,175 --> 00:35:39,137
Who here is familiar
with the story of Hanukkah?
846
00:35:41,704 --> 00:35:44,098
No? No, Red Sea pedestrians?
847
00:35:44,185 --> 00:35:48,102
Okay, well,
today's your lucky day.
848
00:35:48,189 --> 00:35:51,410
Because, Summer Roberts, will
you please join me on stage?
849
00:35:51,497 --> 00:35:53,977
Summer Roberts.
850
00:35:56,328 --> 00:35:58,895
Summer, can I welcome you
to the stage, please?
851
00:36:01,289 --> 00:36:03,987
She's gonna be portraying
the part of Juna Macavee.
852
00:36:04,074 --> 00:36:07,077
And Marissa Cooper will be
portraying the miraculous oil.
853
00:36:07,165 --> 00:36:08,209
Ooh, I hope I didn't give away
the ending.
854
00:36:50,904 --> 00:36:53,036
We're closing up.
855
00:36:59,434 --> 00:37:01,654
[ cash register beeps]
856
00:38:00,626 --> 00:38:01,496
Hey, man.
857
00:38:03,324 --> 00:38:04,586
Ryan.
858
00:38:05,761 --> 00:38:06,545
We're closing up.
859
00:38:06,632 --> 00:38:08,155
Yeah, sorry.
860
00:38:08,242 --> 00:38:12,768
Uh, can I get a pack of
Marlboros and a lottery ticket?
861
00:38:12,855 --> 00:38:13,726
I'm feeling lucky.
862
00:38:17,382 --> 00:38:19,166
Uh-huh.
863
00:38:21,516 --> 00:38:23,866
Come here.
864
00:38:23,953 --> 00:38:25,520
What are you doing here?
865
00:38:25,607 --> 00:38:27,217
I could ask you
the same thing.
866
00:38:27,305 --> 00:38:29,307
I'm handling this, man.Yeah, it looks
like it.
867
00:38:29,394 --> 00:38:30,177
Great plan. I don't
see any holes
in it at all.
868
00:38:30,264 --> 00:38:32,048
I have no choice.
869
00:38:32,135 --> 00:38:33,528
Of course you do.
It doesn't have
to be like this.
870
00:38:33,615 --> 00:38:35,313
Yeah, what am I supposed to do?
871
00:38:35,400 --> 00:38:38,403
You said if anyone would
understand it'd be me.
872
00:38:38,490 --> 00:38:40,666
Well, you're right.
So listen.
873
00:38:40,753 --> 00:38:43,582
Sometimes you gotta let
the rich people help you.
874
00:38:43,669 --> 00:38:46,193
We'll take care
of the surgery.
875
00:38:46,280 --> 00:38:47,890
Let us help.
876
00:38:55,420 --> 00:38:57,770
We should go.
877
00:38:57,857 --> 00:39:00,033
I've got a lot of people
waiting for me.
878
00:39:02,818 --> 00:39:04,777
♪ And when it's dry and ready♪
879
00:39:04,864 --> 00:39:06,561
♪ Oh, dreidel, I will play ♪
880
00:39:06,648 --> 00:39:08,258
Now everybody join in.
881
00:39:08,346 --> 00:39:09,999
♪ Dreidel, dreidel, dreidel ♪
882
00:39:10,086 --> 00:39:12,437
♪ I made it out of... ♪
883
00:39:14,352 --> 00:39:15,788
They don't really like
our songs.
884
00:39:15,875 --> 00:39:19,226
Why don't you let Coop and I
handle this?
885
00:39:19,313 --> 00:39:22,621
If you know
what I mean.
886
00:39:22,708 --> 00:39:25,145
Ready?
887
00:39:25,232 --> 00:39:29,105
♪ Deck the halls
with boughs of holly ♪
888
00:39:29,192 --> 00:39:32,892
♪ Fa, la, la, la, la,
la-la, la, la ♪
889
00:39:32,979 --> 00:39:36,548
♪ 'Tis the season to be jolly ♪
890
00:39:36,635 --> 00:39:39,942
♪ Fa, la, la, la, la,
la-la, la, la ♪
891
00:39:40,029 --> 00:39:43,206
♪ Don we now
our gay apparel... ♪
892
00:39:43,293 --> 00:39:45,078
Our bar mitzvah boy is here,
Ryan Atwood.
893
00:39:45,165 --> 00:39:50,213
[ applause]
894
00:39:50,300 --> 00:39:51,519
Where were you?
895
00:39:51,606 --> 00:39:53,608
I think figuring out
what a mensh is?
896
00:39:53,695 --> 00:39:55,393
They're all yours.
Thanks.
897
00:39:57,699 --> 00:40:00,963
Okay, sorry to keep you guys
waiting.
898
00:40:01,050 --> 00:40:04,010
So, we are all gathered here
for an honorary bar mitzvah.
899
00:40:09,276 --> 00:40:10,756
But, um....
900
00:40:10,843 --> 00:40:12,758
but I wouldn't be here at all
901
00:40:12,845 --> 00:40:17,458
if it weren't for a mitzvah
the Cohens performed for me.
902
00:40:17,545 --> 00:40:22,376
See, mitzvah means any act
of human kindness.
903
00:40:22,463 --> 00:40:24,987
And, well, that's really what
we're here to celebrate.
904
00:40:26,946 --> 00:40:32,995
So, if you'd open your programs
and turn to page two.
905
00:40:35,520 --> 00:40:36,129
Mazeltov, kid.
906
00:40:36,216 --> 00:40:37,609
Thank you, sir.
907
00:40:37,696 --> 00:40:39,045
Come here, come here.We're so proud.
908
00:40:39,132 --> 00:40:40,220
I know.
909
00:40:40,307 --> 00:40:42,178
You're finally a man now.
910
00:40:42,265 --> 00:40:43,179
They're playing
your song.
911
00:40:43,266 --> 00:40:44,703
Yeah, yeah.
912
00:40:44,790 --> 00:40:47,619
Cohen? I think
that I've owed you this dance
913
00:40:47,706 --> 00:40:49,708
for, like, five years.
914
00:40:49,795 --> 00:40:51,449
Well, better late
than never.
915
00:40:51,536 --> 00:40:54,626
Uh, Ryan, this is a song
about friendship.
916
00:40:54,713 --> 00:40:55,627
I'll see you out there.
917
00:40:55,714 --> 00:40:56,976
All right?
918
00:41:02,285 --> 00:41:04,244
Uh, excuse me.
919
00:41:04,331 --> 00:41:06,594
Excuse me a second.
Hey.
920
00:41:06,681 --> 00:41:08,640
This is the moment
Seth's been waiting for.
921
00:41:08,727 --> 00:41:09,641
He finally has some friends.
922
00:41:09,728 --> 00:41:12,078
Sure.
Mm-hmm.
923
00:41:12,165 --> 00:41:13,253
Uh, hang on.
924
00:41:19,389 --> 00:41:20,434
Friends?
925
00:41:22,436 --> 00:41:23,393
Friends.
926
00:41:38,060 --> 00:41:39,671
Actually this is kinda lame.
927
00:41:39,758 --> 00:41:41,020
[ laughs]
928
00:41:41,107 --> 00:41:43,501
Hey.
929
00:41:43,588 --> 00:41:44,937
Sorry.
930
00:41:45,024 --> 00:41:47,156
Hi, Kirsten.
You look lovely.
Julie.
931
00:41:47,243 --> 00:41:49,158
Good to see you.Good to see you.
Sandy.
932
00:41:49,245 --> 00:41:50,290
Doctor.
933
00:41:50,377 --> 00:41:51,683
Good to see you.
934
00:41:51,770 --> 00:41:53,162
Dad! Hey, what are you
doing here?
935
00:41:53,249 --> 00:41:55,991
It's the holidays.
I needed a break.
936
00:41:56,078 --> 00:41:57,950
Well, come dance with us.
937
00:41:58,037 --> 00:41:58,994
Come.
938
00:41:59,081 --> 00:42:01,823
All right. Excuse me.
939
00:42:01,910 --> 00:42:03,085
Excuse me.
940
00:42:08,874 --> 00:42:09,918
Hey.
941
00:42:10,005 --> 00:42:12,225
Dr. Roberts. Shalom.
942
00:42:12,312 --> 00:42:13,879
Shalom.
943
00:42:13,966 --> 00:42:14,923
Friends?
944
00:42:16,664 --> 00:42:18,318
Friends.
945
00:42:18,405 --> 00:42:20,276
Marissa.
946
00:42:20,363 --> 00:42:22,583
Hey, Mom.
Hey.
947
00:42:22,670 --> 00:42:23,715
I come in peace.
948
00:42:23,802 --> 00:42:24,803
Hey, it's the holidays.
949
00:42:24,890 --> 00:42:26,848
It's nice to see you.
950
00:42:26,935 --> 00:42:28,720
What did I tell you?
951
00:42:28,807 --> 00:42:32,245
Best Chrismukkah ever.